Hello Sun

Spring is peaking it's little head out... Although I'm pretty sure this is just a false alarm. It'll probably blizzard tomorrow. But until then, I'm going to read Pride and Prejudice outside and look for some stars tonight.

I love finding pieces of music that bring out every emotion in me... All of the good ones, that is. The kind that makes me think of mountain tops, open fields and salty air. I can almost feel it wrap itself around me before unraveling me into the wind. I also love when music matches up to what's happening around me at that moment... [Just as it was reaching it's crescendo, a big gust of wind blew through the window. Perfect.]

am i making sense anymore?


I peeled some potatoes earlier for a roast. They made my hands smell like dirt and summer.



I hope you all had a nice Christmas :)

Cold

It's the oddest thing, having nothing to do.
I'll be laying down, watching a movie, and suddenly a feeling will overcome me and I'll think I should be doing something for a class.
It's that unexpected bit of aftershock that seems impossible to shake.

It's always nice to remind myself that I really have nothing to do, though.


[I'm going to be an aunt any day now! :) ]

Final Project

Yay for stressful photography projects!

Double yay for procrastinating on stressful photography projects!

and some bonus points when the pictures suck.

After tomorrow:

No more finals.

No more late nights of writing papers.

No more early mornings.

well... at least until the fifth of next year.

[i passed my finals, too. which deserves a non-sarcastic yay!]

Time for some hot tea, a bagel, and a few episodes of
The Office to celebrate.

Hello, stranger.

Finals are attacking.
In less than a week I'll be done with my first
quarter of college.
It seems like life is getting away from me.
[shouldn't there be more to it than this?]

My photoshop [trial] has decided to attach a mini-virus
to every photo I've edited in the past 2 weeks all of the sudden.
This is especially horrible due to the fact that I spent my
only free day last week editing pictures I took for someone.
Now I have to clean up my computer, and re edit every
single one of them. : (

Oh well.


My room is filled with the ever-present sound of my wind up clock.
tick tock tick tock tick tock.
and the world outside is white and silent. : )
I love the snow...
and the night time.



books in the mail tomorrow?
maybe?

"Do they collide," I ask and you smile

I went on a walk tonight and then came home, grabbed a blanket,
and burrowed inside of it as I sat outside and watched the stars.

It was nice. :)

[I saw a shooting star ^ ^]


Then I came inside and bought some books off of the interweb.
man, i love books...
a lot.


threadless.com is having a sale. You guys should go check them out. [i've ordered 8 so far =\ ]

I hope you all had a good thanksgiving. =]

erm..

why I'm on Blogger right now is beyond me. I should be writing my 2000 words or my 4-5 page paper or finishing--starting-- my math homework. Which is all due tomorrow.

I feel lame. haha. I'm writing a 'novel'. That sounds so ridiculous. haha. ^.^'' =\
It's going very slow... But it's fun, regardless.

I've just realized that people might think I'm odd. I walk around blocks repeatedly and stare at the sky the whole time. I've turned my phone off for the weekend because I like avoiding people-- not that anyone is dying to get a hold of me. Haha. I'm just so sick of phones. They're always... ringing.

Bizarre.


I have to pee...

and write some more.



harmony-- did you ever get my second letter? If not, then I think we should message/e-mail/whatever and compare addresses. U.U

"Love is watching someone die"

Today is too good for words.

The leaves are continuously falling from the big maple in my back yard and I'm sitting beneath it, waiting for them all. It's breezy and sunny and beautiful.

I just got back from a walk around town, each step was in time with "What Sarah Said." I shuffled through leaves, smiled at strangers, had a polite conversation with a mailman [that I passed twice]. I mailed my letter, walked back through town, and took the long way home with the wind blowing and the sun covering everything the whole time.

I wish there were more days like this. It was a good day.

:> my dog keeps trying to jump onto the swinging bench with me... I don't think it's going to work. Sorry, Joe.


I love it here. I love the simplicity and the small street fairs that act as huge family reunions with people you haven't seen in 2 days. I love the fact that the stars are so bright at night and that if I sit on the front porch people will wave or nod heir head in passing. It's calm and familar and it's home.





i miss you guys..

Hmm..

I was stressing earlier about a project. I think this is that moment in college where students have their mini break downs. I've never been a fan, but I guess I have to have a break down at some point. I'm pretty sure I never had one at TGS. Weird...

NaNoWriMo!

Weeee!National Novel Writing Month. I'm trying to participate. The main goal is to write a novel of at least 50,000 words by midnight of November 30th. It's actually pretty cool. You sign up and meet other people who are putting aside a month of their lives to do something crazy that they normally wouldn't have done. It doesn't have to be perfect. You just have to write-- just get something out on paper. Then December is dedicated to editing and looking over everything you've written.

I've doodled a lot of stars in margins. :>

How have you been?

I'm hungry.

I hate, hate, hate when people get into sad moods. I want to jump on them and throw buckets of love on them. But that's so hard to do when I live so far away from everyone.
=[ I feel so helpless.

It's weird to think how fearless kids are. The older you get, the more fearful you are; The more real the concept of death becomes. I don't want that to stop me from doing everything I have ever dreamt of doing. I don't like being afraid of death so much that I never really live in the first place.


I want to live freely.

There's a light that makes everything beautiful.
It coats the earth with it's orange warmth for only a small while each day, and makes everything it touches feel hopeful.
It's the kind of light that's sparks creativity and liquifies stone hearts.

It's magic light.

Reading my past

I was rereading my Walkabout posts.

It's fun to watch everything just... Unfold.

Right before my eyes.

I get to remember all of the small details I have forgotten and I smile at my reaction to the things I didn't know were going to happen, but know now. I miss everyone and can't wait to go back and visit. That trip has changed my life in so many ways. I gained friendships. Not just in Georgia, but here at home as well. Writing letters to my friends made me think that maybe, just maybe, high school friends can always stay in touch and don't have to stop talking, no matter where they go.

I never want to lose sight of that.

We suck at this...

But that's okay :-]


Picnics are the best thing in the world.


I don't really have anything to say... =\

Math is still really tedious, english is going alright.


Photography is wonderful =]


I get angry at myself for not truly learning how to operate a camera years ago. ISO, Aperture, Shutter Speed... Oh well-- I'm learning it now. I just need to retain that information.


First project was due today; Monochrome:




















Edit: I love when good things come from accidents

:D

Hi =]


I started my classes at CSCC yesterday. I'm taking a ridiculous math class, engl 101, and Photography.

Photography makes me excited about life. The teacher [she's not a professor yet] gave us an outline of what we're going to do... And I can't wait. I think it's good that I have set goals now instead of just shooting whatever I want to shoot. I'm going to have to be more creative and open. I find that I kind of like being challenged. :]


[I bought more polaroid film. =D]

hoo-ha, nerdfighters!

It is infinitely easier to lay back into the comfort of my pillow than to do things that I ought to be doing.
Oh, bed-- why must you tempt me so?



My sunflower has finally bloomed. :D

(cell picture..)







If you had to describe yourself using only four objects, what would those objects be?
[After giving up on my own list, I asked a friend to make one for me. He said:
book, tree, hammock, and bubbles- as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. I guess sometimes you really do just need an outsiders opinion.. Yay friends!]

I'm nervous about school... =\



Favorites:
type writers.
worn journals.
ephalents.
sun flowers. :]
papasan chairs.

34 days

my friend of 14 years is leaving this Saturday to go to Ashland. it hasn't really sunk in, but it's beginning to. everyone is leaving.

i wish i weren't so repetitive, i feel like i babble on about the same things. things are changing. the leaves are looking sleepier. i have a cold. we have a new couch that makes it harder to leave the house. i'm still in love with everything. does that make the love i give less meaningful, since i give it to so many different things?

------------------

“It’s grown so much,” I say as we both gaze up at the once small oak tree.
“Did you think it wouldn’t?” my friend asks. We stay squinting at the tree for a while, the sun perched high in the late July sky. Summer had only just started, yet it was quickly coming to an end and everything we’ve been avoiding is going to have to be talked about. But for now we just sit in a mutual silence.
When the tree had first been planted 10 years earlier, it couldn’t even begin to take the place of the tree that had just been cut down. It was small and awkward. My family referred to it as the Charlie Brown tree. The sticks, that would hopefully one day become strong branches, would bow under the smallest amount of pressure and only produced a few leaves. Yet here it was, towering over our house years later. It wasn’t that I didn’t think it’d grow, I just didn’t expect it to happen so suddenly.
We both look down at our feet and wiggle our toes. What do you say to someone who knows everything you have to say?

The Hippie that got her hair cut...

Sometimes I wish my fingers knew how to place every feeling, finding the perfect word to describe that emotion, then put it gently on the screen in front of me.

It's an emotion that makes my eyes fill with tears. Not because I'm sad, but because I've never felt this much love before. It makes my stomach flip and my eyes smile. It's the feeling I get when I drive with the windows down and the road endless, or when I lay in the grass with the wind dancing in the leaves.

It's the feeling of getting a letter full of thoughts that make you smile.

Of talking late and not caring; just saying whatever comes to mind in a sleepy voice.

It's a feeling that ends up leaving me speechless in awe.

hallo.

moving.moving.moving.

everything's changing and staying the same all at once.
my days are spent lying in a hammock, feeling the sun caress my skin,
while my nights stretch out before me in a quiet, dream-like state as the town tucks itself in and the fire flies come out to lazily float outside my open window.


I'm noticing the beauty in everything and taking pictures of the clouds.
I'm noticing the small things that, when put together, make up Life.

And while all of this is happening, I have a smile on my face and my fingers are outstretched, weaving themselves in and out of the passing, rushing, wind.

I've hit a sad period.

Boo, sadness.


I find it amazing that if you get the right strand of notes together, you can ignite every single emotion all at once in the heart of anyone who's listening.

Me= Slacker

Adele= Love.


I got my temps, and in the past 24 hours have driven through town, on the freeway, through a bigger town, and started learning how to drive a standard.
[i got them on Thursday... Finally.]

I miss you. :o[


New news:
I bought a bookshelf.

....
yeah. That's it, really.

I hope the 'Real World' isn't this repetitive. =\
All I've been doing lately is getting up, going to work, coming home, talking to friends online, reading, and sleeping...
It's incredibly dull.

I want to help people. I donated to the food bank yesterday. Yay good-doing! :D
But it's not enough...

la dee dum

Hi. :o]


Don't worry- I'm not always annoyingly happy. I'm currently sitting at Como, smelling of gas, grass, and cigarette smoke. Yum, right? It's not too bad, really. I just sit at a computer typing in work orders and such... And I get paid more than I would anywhere else.

Yay money!
>.<

stupid money....

But, alas, we all need it to buy the things we need to survive.
Like type writers and hammocks, of course!

oh... and food...
[unless you have a fruit producing plant in your yard...]


Mmmm.... Fruit producing plants....

July?!

Really? Already?

[my hair's really big tonight... o.O]


My hammock ^.^


The View from my Hammock :D

I really like that hammock. [It's definitely on my favorites list]




Oh-- and this is downtown, close up, from my house down the street, aka: on the other side of town.


and a kitty cat that just happened to be crossing the street.

The trees at the back of the picture is where the town ends.
I may not act like it sometimes, but I really do love it here.


I like the fact that I'm growing closer to some people even though I never see them as often as I used to. It makes me smile. :o]

I feel good about everything. The Future. Starting new at a different place. Life. I know I will lose contact with a majority of the people I've grown with, but that's how life goes. You grow; you learn; you make friends and lose some, but you will always have those funny moments and the experiences you had while with them-- the experiences that mold you into who you are and who you are going to be. And I know that whatever happens, it will all be okay. The world is constantly spinning; moving. Changing. Always throwing something new at us.

I'm glad that I'm finally learning to embrace and run with that. I don't want to dwell. I want to live now, because I'll never get these moments back.

Okay. I'm going to quit rambling =\ sorry.
S'more time :)


Pee. Es.
I hope I never, ever, ever lose contact with you guys.

Hi :o]

Happy June 28th :)

favorite things-
the way a puppy's paw feels so soft.
the smell of rain.
the way the sun falls through curtains.
wind.
LETTERS! :D

[i don't like spiders and i miss my friends... a lot ): ]


When I was little I thought the bugs that make the loud chchchchchchchchch sounds from their perch in the trees were really giant house-sized spiders off in the distance. I was amazed when my dad showed me that this tiny insect was making such a big noise.

I think that's when I realized small creatures were capable of large things.

Optimization

[That's someone I've never met's favorite thing.
what's yours?]
- - - - -


Sometimes I feel like I want too much out of life... Is that possible? Life is supposed to be infinite, but how can it be if it's limited? Maybe you're just supposed to live like it's infinite; like anything's possible. In a way I guess anything is possible.

Yeah.. I like that better.

Life is infinite.
I can be anything-- do anything.

So Life right now, is Spectacular.


- - - - - - -



"Now we wait."
"No. We breathe. We pulse. We regenerate. Our hearts beat.
Our minds create. Our souls ingest. 37 seconds well used, is a lifetime."

"Um... The Emergency Brake isn't working"

Funny, isn't it?
How things usually work themselves out.

I've found a beach house for 1,760 a week, I might
be looking at a Jeep this weekend, and
Jack Johnson is making me smile.


Even if the first two fall through, that's okay. Because something better will come along.
I can feel it.


I hope life always feels like this.